Stop Feeling Guilty When You’ve Done Nothing Wrong
Break free from guilt that isn’t yours. RTT® Hypnotherapy can help you set boundaries and reconnect with your truth.
Do you ever find yourself apologising for things that weren’t your fault? Feeling bad for saying “no”? Or carrying guilt that doesn’t actually belong to you?
It’s exhausting, and you’re not alone.
Sometimes we feel guilty not because we’ve done something wrong, but because we’ve been made to feel that way. Whether it’s due to early conditioning, toxic relationships, or people-pleasing habits, that misplaced guilt can weigh heavily on your mind and confidence.
What Is Unfair Guilt?
Unfair guilt is the feeling of being “bad” or “selfish” even when you haven’t done anything wrong. It often stems from:
Being raised to prioritise others over yourself
Fear of conflict or disappointing people
Manipulative or emotionally controlling dynamics
Internalised beliefs like “my needs don’t matter” or “I must always be kind”
It’s different from genuine guilt, the kind that comes when you’ve crossed your own moral line. Unfair guilt is about perceived wrongdoing, often planted by others or rooted in outdated beliefs.
Common Signs You’re Carrying Guilt That’s Not Yours
You say sorry all the time, even when you’ve done nothing wrong
You feel anxious or selfish for setting boundaries
You agree to things you don’t want to do, just to avoid letting someone down
You worry constantly about what people think of you
You feel responsible for others’ emotions or reactions
This type of guilt can be a symptom of people-pleasing, overthinking, and chronic anxiety and it keeps you trapped in cycles where your own needs are always last.
The Hidden Roots of Unfair Guilt
Unfair guilt often begins early. Maybe you were praised for being “the good one”, quiet, helpful, compliant. Maybe love and approval were conditional on keeping others happy. Or perhaps someone in your life used guilt to control or influence you.
Over time, those experiences shape how you see yourself. You might start believing:
“I’m only lovable if I put others first”
“It’s wrong to upset or disappoint people”
“If someone’s unhappy, it’s probably my fault”
But here’s the truth: You are allowed to say no. You are not responsible for managing everyone else’s feelings. You are not selfish for having needs.
A Real-Life Example of Letting Go of Unfair Guilt
If this sounds familiar, you might relate to this RTT® case study, where a client overcame years of overthinking and people-pleasing, all rooted in guilt that didn’t belong to them.
They learned to trust themselves again, speak up with confidence, and finally feel free from the emotional weight they’d been carrying.
How RTT® Hypnotherapy Helps You Break Free
RTT® (Rapid Transformational Therapy) helps uncover the root of your guilt and gently reprogram the beliefs that keep it in place. Instead of simply learning to “cope” with guilt, RTT® helps you release it altogether, for good.
Using a blend of hypnotherapy, cognitive behavioural techniques, and psychotherapy, RTT® works at a deep subconscious level to:
Understand why you’ve felt guilty for simply being yourself
Break the link between love, approval, and people-pleasing
Replace guilt with self-trust and calm confidence
Help you set boundaries without anxiety, fear, or guilt
Restore your emotional clarity and inner peace
It’s not just theory, research has shown that hypnotherapy can significantly reduce feelings of anxiety and emotional distress by targeting the subconscious mind (Hammond, 2010). A systematic review also found hypnosis to be effective in helping people change long-held emotional patterns and beliefs (Valentine et al., 2019).
RTT® builds on this foundation by guiding you through those early experiences, often from childhood, and helping you gently reframe the beliefs you picked up. For example, if you learned that love must be “earned” by putting others first, RTT® can help you break that link and create a new one: that you are worthy as you are.
In a deeply relaxed state, we explore the original cause of the guilt, resolve the emotional imprint, and install healthier, more empowering beliefs, the kind that feel good and actually stick.
Many people describe RTT® as the first time they’ve felt like themselves, without the weight of guilt.
Support That Goes Deeper
If this kind of guilt has left you feeling anxious or unsure of yourself, you’re not alone. It often goes hand in hand with low confidence and anxiety, but the good news is, these patterns can change.
👉 Explore how RTT® Hypnotherapy for Anxiety helps you feel calm, grounded, and emotionally safe again.
👉 Or find out more about RTT® for Confidence perfect for rebuilding self-trust and assurance.
FAQs About Guilt and RTT®
Q: Is it normal to feel guilty for saying no?
A: Yes, especially if you were raised to prioritise others or avoid conflict. But healthy boundaries are not selfish, they’re essential.
Q: How do I know if my guilt is real or false?
A: Ask yourself: Have I actually done something wrong, or do I just feel bad for not meeting someone else’s expectations? Real guilt is about violating your own values. False guilt is often about breaking someone else’s unspoken rules.
Q: Will RTT® make me forget people or memories?
A: Not at all. RTT® brings clarity and understanding. It helps you make peace with your past so you can move forward, with more freedom and less emotional weight.
Want to Go Deeper?
If guilt is tangled up with trying to keep everyone happy, you might enjoy this blog on why people-pleasers struggle with guilt.
Or if you’re wondering whether someone’s making you feel guilty on purpose, this blog on manipulation explores the signs and how to reclaim your clarity.
Ready to Break the Cycle?
Let’s chat. I offer a free consultation so we can explore what’s going on and how RTT® can help you feel free, strong, and back in control of your own emotions.
👉 Book your free consultation here
only you can decide how you wish to feel.
As Oprah Winfrey states:
Have you ever said “yes” when deep down you wanted to say “no”?
Many of us have, especially if we’ve been conditioned to avoid conflict or seek approval.
Oprah has spoken openly about her own journey with the “disease to please”, and said that despite all her fame, success and popularity: “The greatest success I have achieved is feeling comfortable saying ‘no’ without feeling guilty about it.”
She shares that her turning point came from finding the internal strength to say: “No. I will not let you treat me this way.”
And perhaps most powerfully: “It’s OK if people don’t like you. It’s about how you feel about yourself.”
What's next?
Please feel free to contact me if you have identified with the comments and suggestions above and would like help with saying no!
Just press the button below to arrange a free, no obligation 30 minutes chat.
Look after yourself, Joanna x
Related articles:
Why You Feel Guilty for Setting Boundaries – And How to Stop – Learn how RTT® can help release guilt and strengthen boundaries.
Overcome Stress with Hypnotherapy | Find Calm & Clarity with RTT® – Explore techniques to reduce stress and reconnect with inner calm.
- See how RTT® Hypnotherapy supports healing from past events – Learn techniques to release the past and regain emotional clarity.